Growing up as a “mixed child” is a truly funny thing. I grew up not understanding that skin colour could be such a strong differentiator among people. I grew up participating in two different cultures, two different languages, two different styles of cuisine, and two different customs. Difference was normal to me. Growing up, I didn’t feel the need to question where people were from based on their skin colour or appearance, because I did not expect anyone to look a certain way… I expected everyone to look different. I expected others to feel the same way about me... to not judge me based on what I looked like, but based on who I was. And for the most part, that is how my childhood was. I had a diverse group of friends. We were friends because we did fun things together and that was it.
Then, all of a sudden by the time I turned 15, I was constantly getting asked if I was mixed and what countries my parents were from and which parent was the black parent. All of sudden, people would be sticking their fingers in my hair telling me how my hair is so beautiful and exotic. All of a sudden, people began commenting on my name saying that my first name is a sassy black girl name but my last name is so Italian. All of a sudden my skin colour spoke louder than my words or my personality. My identity constantly came into question and to some I wasn’t “white enough” to others I wasn’t “black enough”. I was so frustrated with feeling so inadequate not because of lack of character but because my skin colour sat in the middle of a spectrum in a world that wanted you to choose a side.
I wish that the world didn’t see my skin colour as an indication of my character because it’s not. I wish that people would stop making assumptions about me based on my skin colour because their assumptions are always wrong.
As such a supposedly intelligent species, I’m not sure why we let such surface level differences prevent us from building connections with people from all walks of life. Difference is what makes us beautiful and it is what makes life interesting. Difference provides perspective, and is not something to be afraid of. Rather, it should be celebrated.
It is your responsibility to recognize your bias, and it is your responsibility to grow, learn and to do better today than you did yesterday.